Confessions of Suburban Rockstar wannabe mama

I am exhausted today. This night time life style of being a working musician was a lot easier in my 20's! Yesterday's adventures of a suburban wanna be rock star mama went something like this…Wake up late due to a late Friday night rehearsal. Ship child #1 off to karate, play blocks and legos with child #2. Oh and Polly Pockets- you know what those are? They are tiny plastic dolls that wear tiny rubber dresses that no one without a degree from MIT can figure out how to get on without ripping. Whoever invented those should be wrapped in rubber and made to sit with a bunch of children while attempting to dress these tiny little torture devices. Manage to get both kids looking respectable despite the fact that child #1 owns nothing other than sweat pants and jeans. And getting him to wear a collared shirt was a battle worthy of several martinis. Go to friends daughter's first communion. Drink too much wine at after party. Get home, find dog has barfed all over the kitchen, clean up barf, clean rabbit (Queen Craps a lot)'s cage. Try to make house look respectable so sitter won't spread rumors (all true of course) about the despicable state of my house. Get in shower 15 min before sitter arrives. Look out window to see both children disappearing into the neighborhood. I have a sitter and no children, I am naked, wet, wrapped in a towel and screaming like a banshee in my backyard. Give up on finding children, commence rockstar transformation. Children find their way home, sitter arrives….hop into car to go to the gig. Get to gig knowing that I am in for a night of cluster-fuckedness. Yes, I just made up that word. Event starts one hour late, I am ready for my pjs and pillow at least an hour before we hit the stage. Get on stage, sans soundcheck, can't hear anything but we crank through our set….oh I forgot the stripper who went on before us…and yes, mom and dad were in the audience. yup. And through it all John and new guy Rob were laughing and rolling with it. They are good sports and I am lucky to be making music with them! Along the way, my new video won three awards..Best Director, Best Cinematography and First Runner Up for Best Video….so that's pretty cool and I have a neat award to put on my shelf. Today, I clean up dog poo in the back yard….